were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
