I wannas sexs uuuuu
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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