today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I FOUND THE LEGS
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
