Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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