Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
