Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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