we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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