gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize