Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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