found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize