I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
