remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize