We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize