you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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