I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
