Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize