You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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