He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
