If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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