he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
