You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
