I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Randomize
