Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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