I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
