I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I cockslap morals
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
