Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
