I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
