I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I canβt really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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