She said her name was "party"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Shame - the story of my life.
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