Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
