even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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