yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
