i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
