You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
