Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
