its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
