My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize