My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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