He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You can't motorboat a personality
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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