I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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