So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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