She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
