i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
