at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
