You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
