my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
