Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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