Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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