You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
