At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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